Of Love and Marriage

May, June, and July have been so busy in the wedding and engagement departments.

Three acquaintances and a family member got married.  My brother-in-law got engaged which means we will have a wedding in Chicago or Omaha in the future.

These events made me think about the wedding I had with FullEclipse and how things could have been.

I make no secret that I was married before.  The wedding was gorgeous, but the marriage did not last.

When I met FullEclipse, I had no intentions of ever falling in love again or even walking down the aisle again.  Everything changed overnight.  We got engaged very quickly.  Our intention was to have a big wedding in Chicago in a few years.  We did not want to rush anything.  Even though this would have been my second marriage, FullEclipse wanted me to have the wedding of my dreams.  But, things worked out very differently.  FullEclipse and I just couldn’t wait to be together forever.  We were also trying to have a baby and decided that the best course of action was to get married.  I had a suspicion that I was pregnant by our wedding day anyway.

So, one day we woke up and said to each other, “let’s get married!”  That was it.  No big party, no big celebration, no professional pictures, nothing that screamed, “Big wedding!”.   I bought a blue dress and off to the court-house we went on a Friday afternoon.  My parents were the only people who were invited as witnesses.  The guy who married us was about 18 years old and wearing torn jeans.   He looked like such a kid.  It was just the perfect way for us to say, “I love you.  Let’s spend the rest of our lives together!”  By the way, my hunch was right, I was pregnant with Paczki.

To this day, our love and devotion to each other and our family remains just as strong as it did when we got married.  Our bond is stronger.  I love being married to FullEclipse.

But, these celebrations have me thinking.  As much as our wedding was special, I feel like we should have had a bigger celebration.  My in-laws missed everything.  My plan is to renew our vows in a few years.  I am paying off all of our credit card debt first.  I will have my big celebration with my husband and my two children.

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T Minus Six Weeks for K2

Time flies especially when you are unprepared!

K2 will be here in six weeks.  I spoke to my new doctor yesterday and he told me that the tentative schedule for the c-section is 8/24/11.

Where did the time go?

Where is K2’s blog?

Why didn’t I exercise?

How will our family be affected by the new arrival?

Will the dogs be okay with the new baby?

What about the limited space we have?

What about our routine?

Where is my driver’s license?

Why didn’t I learn to drive before I got pregnant?

How will FullEclipse and I make time to give each kid the name they need?

Oh My God, who will take care of me while I get over the c-section?

What if I go into panic mode while I am on the operating table?

FullEclipse will be at work this time around.  He will not be able to stay over night at the hospital like he did with Paczki.  We had such a nice time bonding.  It was the K family against the world.

Taking care of K2 will be my sole responsibility.  I feel bad for this kid.  I really do!  FullEclipse was the best stay at home parent.  Paczki thrived with him.  I don’t know if I can even come close to being as good as my husband.  He did everything!

But, I gotta sit down and relax.

Things will work out.  I am blessed to have this child.  I am lucky to have a daughter who is growing strong everyday and a husband who loves me.

I am lucky to have gotten pregnant when a lot of women struggle with fertility.

I do, however, need to get my act together and buy K2 a crib!